Are We On a Pilgrimage?

I just finished Don Miller's Through Painted Deserts. Miller is an amazing writer. I'm not a big reader, it's not my thing. but when I find someone that can speak to me thru writing I enjoy it very much. There are times when I read him I feel like he's looking thru me and writing what's in my heart and mind.

Looking back, I can't quite figure out what it was that dragged me along with Don and Paul thru those painted deserts. Like their journey, it started out randomly and probably wouldn't go anywhere. But it did.

We are all on a journey thru life - it never ends. We're always growing and learning and experiencing. Life is a gift. Figuring out what to do with that gift is a monster that looms over every teenager and young adult. You can ignore it, sure, but it's still there. And one day you're done with college or tired of working in a grocery store and you realize that it's time to do something. Maybe not even for yourself, but because everyone expects you to. It's a scary thing. But life is a gift. And gifts should be enjoyed. It's magnificent, it's beautiful.

Yesterday I gutted a pomegranate, the first I've done on my own. I thank my dad for introducing me to them a few years ago. At first I was disgusted by the looks of it. They are one of those things that freaks you out and makes you wonder why in the world God would make a fruit like that. But then you really think about it and realize that God did make that. He designed it and I can picture him sitting at a table drawing up plans for it. What an imagination He has. And this world...this universe that we are in is full of objects and places just like pomegranates - things that you or I could never think of, that we could never design.
Someday I'll tell my children about pomegranates.

Due to an ill bike, I've taken to driving to my classes. It's easier so I haven't really tried to fix my bike seat. I'm wanting to more and more each day, alas, I do not. Still, once i fight for a spot and park I always don my headphones and iPod and listen to music as I walk.
I'm not sure what it is, maybe thinking back about Miller's thoughts or just the words and music in my head, but I'm growing to love life and where I am. I may not have many friends but perhaps growing in my ideas and personal identity is more important now.

I just want to be happy. I want to say at the end of my life that I have done what has made me happy. I want to say that I have enjoyed what I've had and made the most of it and not been bogged down my an idea of happiness that is portrayed thru media as the perfect American life that will never be accomplished.
I know what I think will make me happy. I know my passions and that I could not live without music. Realizing that God has a plan is hard to do. To hand this gift, the gift that He gave, back to him and say I can't handle this as if it's fine china is difficult. Because I want to hold onto it and not let anyone touch it but myself. Even though I know it is more likely that I will mess it up Than Him. Once it's back in his hands that monster doesn't look so big.

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Current Listens:
A Fine Frenzy
Eric Bachmann
Bill Mallonee
Josh Ritter
Sea Wolf
Elliott Smith
George Winston